Teens' Night Out
I went to the mall last night, even though I hate going there on weekends. My husband, son, step daughter and I, went to the play area to kick off the weekend.
On our way, I saw a group of girls, around 13-14 year-olds, huddled in the corner, laughing hysterically. Across from them, was a group of boys, all with greasy styled hair and really low-waist jeans looking at the girls, making remarks and giving them looks that only made the girls laugh harder, in a flirtatious sense!
On the second floor, I saw a very similar situation. A few meters away, there it was again. It was awful. Any caring mother would shiver at the sight of her daughter behaving in that manner and at the sound of her son using such language. And the thing is, judging from their clothing and appearance, they all seemed to come from good families.
I think there is a huge difference between teaching your child that it is ok to be friends and go out with the opposite gender and between what was going on last night.
Last night, it was about flirting, exchanging numbers, and doing something that is wrong, at a considerably young age. And, I saw it more than once.
I often hear mothers say that they want their daughters to be liberal and to have fun (in a way that they, themselves never got to do). Yet, drawing the line, teaching your child self-respect, refinement and class when it comes to behaving with the opposite gender will set the tone for all his/her future relationships.
In fact, since as adults, we respect the respectable, it is only natural that our teens will do the same.
The question is, how do you talk to your children about this? Do you set rules and lay down punishments or do you give them the freedom to make mistakes?
Has anyone tried this?
4 comments:
Oh, this is what I felt & saw also this weekend, as you, I generally don’t like to go out on crowded places on weekend, but I had to that Thursday! & I was shocked of those behaviors! I’m pregnant with a girl, and all the time I was praying Allah not to let my little girl be as those I saw! As you said some were too young for those movements! & what get me most shocked when I saw a guy pulling a girl into him, and kissing her on her neck! Inform of her friends and all people!! That blew my mind away!
Rawan Z
Oh my god! I can't believe what you are saying!! That really is ridiculous.
It's such a shame that girls these days really don't have any sense of their self-worth.
On a happier note, congratulations on the pregnancy :) Is this your first baby?
times they are achanging.. to the worse... i don't allow my daughter 12.5 or son 16 to go to the mall and walk around. my daughter's friends are allowed to go the mall to walk around, when she asked me why she couldn't i explained that the mall is a shopping place and that if she needed anything i would gladly take her, it is also an intertainment place ( movies and food) again i would gladly take her and be there when the movie is over ( i'm giving her a bit of freedom) but a mall is not to walk around, checking people out and making remarks at people you don't know. i also talked to my son about this . i'm all for giving my child freedom but it should be in a way that doesn't harm them and it should be gradual. i feel sorry for us parents in this day and age!
Noora, thanks, she's my second girl.
Noora we'll be glad if you can write how to raise a child who knows that these stuff are wrong and act right from his own :)
Rawan Z
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